


A Promise

by IMissYouSoFar



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 03:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4163340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IMissYouSoFar/pseuds/IMissYouSoFar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This in no way shows my opinion for Jamia Iero or Lindsey Way. It was just an idea I had.</p>
    </blockquote>





	A Promise

**Author's Note:**

> This in no way shows my opinion for Jamia Iero or Lindsey Way. It was just an idea I had.

My mind flew high and I thought of Gerard again. He wasn’t with me anymore, but if I drank just a little more, maybe I would feel the way I did when I was with him. I wanted his love back. I craved it more than anything.

Of course, I loved Jamia to pieces. She gave me our three beautiful children, and she stuck with me when Gerard entered my life. Jamia honest wanted me to be happy, and she let me go to be with him. Only. . . he didn’t want to be with me forever. He wanted to be with me, he said.

Just a few more weeks, and I’ll come out. I promise.

He promised me things for years at a time. Most of these things were fueled by alcohol and other drugs and addictions. Why did we end up hooking up in the first place? We just clicked. We were inseparable. . . young, naive, stupid. But we were in love. I fell hard for him, and he wasn’t willing to give up anything for me.

The bottle slipped from my hand onto the floor as I curled in a ball, letting out a few sobs. A few memories flashed through my mind.

 

_Gerard’s arms wrapped around me and he pulled me in close, peppering kisses all over the place. “Need you. Love you,” he mumbled, sliding his hands down the front of my jeans. I giggled and turned to kiss him on the mouth._

_“Promise I’ll tell everybody soon So soon, I love you,” he whispered in my ear, sending shivers down my spine. I smiled and kissed him deeply, turning to wrap my arms around him._

_“I love you too,” I murmured in his ear. I backed him into the counter and continued to press my lips all over his skin._

 

That was my favorite memory we had together. We had made love, and stayed together in my bed. I had held him close, and he became undone because of my doing. I was the reason he got that way. Not anymore. . .

 

_“Frank?” Ray asked, crouching down and trying to pull me up. “Frank, are you crying?”_

_I was a wreck. Gerard was getting married, and he hadn’t even known this woman for two months. He had known me for seven years, and he told me we would be together, and we would come out. I wanted that so badly, but he was married to this girl now._

_I let Ray pull me up and I didn’t even bother wiping away my tears. There would be more, and that I was sure of._

_“H-he said we could get married someday,” I whispered, hiccupping and trying to gain my composure. Ray pulled me into an embrace and held me tightly on the pavement._

_He promised me. Just a few more weeks and we could tell everybody. But, like always, he had lied. This time, I knew we wouldn’t ever get back together._

_“Ray, I can’t do this anymore.” It was official; my heart was shattered to bits, and nothing could fix me this time._

That was the worst day of my life. Gerard and I had been in love, and I didn’t understand why he didn’t hold onto me tighter. My sobs were growing quiet, though my head was swimmy, and I felt nauseous. But what did that matter? I couldn’t be with Gerard ever again. He didn’t love me anymore.

 

_“Baby, I love you,” Gerard whispered in my ear, quickly kissing the side of my face before singing into the mic again. For some reason, this didn’t soothe me. I had screamed, “Lie to me!” in the microphone when I was supposed to say trust me. I couldn’t trust anybody to save my life. Gerard taught me that._

_He kept shooting me sideways glances during the whole set, trying to smile at me. All I did was stare at him. I felt done with everything at this point. I played my heart out until it was done, running backstage before I had to face Gerard._

_I felt somebody grab my arm and yank me to a closet before I could say anything. Suddenly, Gerard was pressing kisses all over my face and neck, mumbling that he wanted me. I nearly gave in until I felt his ring brush against my cheek._

_“S-stop. I can’t do this anymore, Gerard,” I said harshly, shoving him back. “I loved you, and you hurt me. I can’t even look at you right now.” I rolled my eyes and shoved him out of the way, joining the rest of the band to meet some fans._

 

At least he had wanted me then. Now he wouldn’t even text me back, let alone say he wanted me. My nails dug into my palms as I started to cry again.

Gerard would sing me to sleep at times, especially when I would wake from a nightmare. He made up silly songs, and would even sing me songs about me that he wanted to get released but never did. He loved me, and he made me feel so loved in those times.

“Sing to me,” I whispered, trying to get my voice to reach him when he was across the country.”One more time. Give me one more promise.”

One more chance. . . I just needed one more chance, maybe another change. He used to promise me that everything was going to be okay.

He always promised that.

  



End file.
